I decided to personalize a Christmas song for the holiday season.... I have always read that a good writer draws from experience...... that said..........
THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS
On the 1st day of Christmas my true love gave to me...
A test of my paternity............
On the 2nd day of Christmas my true love gave to me...
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 3rd day of Christmas my true love gave to me...
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 4th day of Christmas my kinda-love gave to me...
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 5th day of Christmas my kinda-love gave to me...
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 6th day of Christmas my kinda-love gave to me...
6 months of nagging
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 7th day of Christmas my fading love gave to me...
7 slaps-a-slapping
6 months of nagging
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 8th day of Christmas my fading love gave to me...
8 male strippers...damn
7 slaps-a-slapping
6 months of nagging
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 9th day of Christmas my fading love gave to me...
My nine iron all bended
8 male strippers...damn
7 slaps-a-slapping
6 months of nagging
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 10th day of Christmas my ex-love gave to me...
10 of my friends she fondled
She nine ironed my windshield
8 male strippers...damn
7 slaps-a-slapping
6 months of nagging
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 11th day of Christmas my ex-love gave to me...
11 my shits on the lawn
10 of my friends she fondled
She nine ironed the stereo
8 male strippers...damn
7 slaps-a-slapping
6 months of nagging
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
On the 12th day of Christmas my ex-love gave to me...
12 damn its raining!!!!!!
11 my shits on the lawn
10 of my friends she fondled
She nine ironed my TV
8 male strippers...damn
7 slaps-a-slapping
6 months of nagging
5 faked orgasms....
4 we reconciled
3 restraining orders
2 middle fingers
And a test of my paternity............
Merry Christmas and Happy Caroling!!
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