My Blog Vacation Update

So kicking back here in my lounge chair, sipping on my Zima mimosa, and soaking in some Portland rays while swimming the Willamette.......I felt compelled to weigh in on my blog vacation. I have been relaxing and taking in some Oregon "culture"....you know strip clubs, yeti hunts, and ironic t-shirts... Speaking of those damn yetis....Im getting close.....I have tracked one back to a nice secluded Oregon vacation home......

He goes by Mr Williams....clearly an alias.......I better catch him before a certain Ex-Vice President does...... he definately doesn't catch & release like I would.....moving on....


what else have I been doing?  Hmmm


Ive been catching up with laundry and household chores....about 150 posts worth....


also been catching up on my new favorite show... Seventeen And Pregnant AGAIN.... riveting!


Pickin up trash on I-5....not so much by choice.....


I also had breakfast with a friend at a strip club...long story......gotta say it kinda looses the magic watching them pressure wash the pole and mop up last night's daddy issues.....just sayin!!!!


what else........oh ya Ive been researching what ever happened to the ellusive B battery...seriously? Rumor has it it runs the shakeweight....looking into it.....


Ive been stalking an ex or two....love the new hairstyle ladies!!!....alot....really really alot......call me


Been doing some intense hard core research on why some celebrities grow such enormous heads....
and thinking about a career switch to become Hollywoods first face trainer....."Smile, frown, wink, smile, snort, diet pill, fake laugh, fake laugh.... repeat!" "Smile, frown, wink..........

                                                        My first two clients...........


But anyways Ive got to run......Im working on writing this comedy about Portland and how its like we are stuck in the 90's....were such a funny backwards people..... except not funny enough for a real cable channel to air....IFC Channel really?? I mean first we only have one pro sports team and then we cant even get a regular channel to air our...........er.....I meant..........Its gonna be funny......I hope the networks pick it up........blog ya later Im going back in for another swim.....