Yep....
She wants one of those furry little monsters!!!
I know right???
What the hell???
Well its as she put it.....
"I need SOMEONE in this house to actually listen to me!!!"
"Huh?" I responded...
Anyways...
Why a dog I thought??
Am I not mess enough?
I can only imagine she wants someone she can finally dress up in girly ways???....
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| Ughh! |
Or maybe someone to share beauty products with.....
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| Though.... personally I think hooker red... only serves to cheapen a proud Schnauzer... |
Well...... Whatever...
I'm not sold!!!
You see... I see being a dog owner differently...
I see it as more of a...
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| Potential problem..... |
And a huge freekin commitment!!!!
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| I mean.... do you have a long enough leash? |
And what about exercising it?
Do you have the proper room for it to run?
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| and run.... and run.... and run.... and run.... ...till you get home? |
I dont know?
There's just SO much that goes into owning a dog these days.....
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| Like how often should I take my "fluffy little foot-rest" to doggy therapy? I really have no idea!!! Do I know of a good vet??? .jpg) Or I guess..... Parts store? |
And do I have enough extra money to put in...
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| A dog-lift? Seriously??? |
Oh and these days you also have to "socialize your dog" apparently?
Give it some friends!
Well..... do I have enough time to make friends for my dog?
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| On line!!!! (side note- Fredrick here "likes" this post!!!) |
Now.... even if Im o.k. with doing all that stuff....
Is my place even "safe" for that little mutt to live in?
This lady thought hers was.....
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| But she was wrong! |
(sigh)
Ugh...
Well then I thought...
I haven't even thought about "what kind of dog to get?"
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| Cause some of these suckers got energy to spare.... |
Im probably better off with a more.....
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| Relaxed breed... |
Oh this is exhausting just thinking about....
I cant even imagine how tiring it would be owning one....
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| This lady knows EXACTLY how tiring!!! |
Well I needed some time to think...
Some time away....
So I went to go play a game of "Workplace Milk-Crate Tetris"!
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| Which always helps to clear my mind!!! |
And it hit me!!!!
Im looking at this all wrong!!
Maybe a dog would benefit me!!!
But in ways I never imagined?
Cause there must be a reason everyone loves dogs!!!
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| Its cause "Dogs LOVE Everybody!!!" |
They do...
And apparently... most other animals even love dogs too!!
Like surprisingly DOLPHINS do??
Who knew... right??
Well they do.....
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| And that could only help with my dolphin fishing!!! (side note- only one "curious" dolphin harmed in the making of this post) |
The more I thought about it....
It could be great...
I could hang out with my other "pet crazy friends"!
Ya... I could let my little rascal play with THEIR house pets...
Their birds....
and their cats...
and their snakes....
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| Which might be regrettable??? But whatever! |
Theirs just so much a good dog could do for me...
Like cheer me on....
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| when I most need it..... |
And offer me encouragement....
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| Afterwards!!! |
They could bring me things....
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| Which would be delicious! |
And when I would take em on walks I could....
 |
| Load that sucker up..... |
They could make me laugh when Im feeling down!
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| Oh "Mr. Peeper" your such a prankster!! |
And they could make me laugh when THEY are feeling down....
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| He would always know just what to do!!! |
Ahhh. Its sounding better and better....
Well its too early to say if we will be getting a dog at this point... But its a definite maybe for me...
And if it ends up true what everyone says...
" A dog is mans best friend"
Well Im on the lookout for one that could fill that description...
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| And I will letcha all know if I find him!! |
And on a surprisingly positive and "cute" note???
Which I think is a blog first?
I better go drink some battery acid or something before next time...
Ah whatever...
Blog ya'll later
I would get a dog if it would stay as a puppy... they're much cuter that way! Fun post as always and good luck on your dog shopping.
ReplyDeleteI want a dog that will wait patiently for me to come home each evening and treat me like a god. In other words, I need a stupid dog!
ReplyDeletetell your potentially new dog to add me as a friend if he gets a Facebook account :)
ReplyDeleteSince we have 5 dogs at our house I maybe a tad biased when it comes to the benefits of having canines. Look at it this way: when your girlfriend get pissed at you she can pet the dog and calm down.
ReplyDeleteAlthough they can be a lot of expense, worry and hassle I think they're definitely worth it. No matter how crappy your day has been being greeted by a happy dog when you gets home makes it better.
Please tell me people don't do that to their dogs. Paint their claws that is. Overall, I do love dogs though. They're worth getting if you can.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend who does that exact thing as a business...she makes a fortune
DeleteYeah I'd have a dog too if I wasn't in a crap apartment, not sure the cat would approve but he'd get over it..haha..although they are a lot of work.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm pretty sure you wouldn't have your dogs nails done, right? ;)
DeleteMr Pepper has the right idea. lol
ReplyDeleteThe sincerity in this post...it frightened me.
ReplyDeleteIf you're concerned about getting a dog, you could always poop in the yard and on the carpet to dissuade her.
Go with a Siberian Husky if you're going to get a dog, because if you get tired of it, I've heard those are the tastiest of dogs. I've heard.
I need to train my dog to fetch me a beer. Then, only then, will he be man's best friend!
ReplyDeleteAnd what the hell is up with that vet? Dog and cat repair? WTF?
AS AN OWNER OF 4 DOGS, i LOVED THIS POST
ReplyDeletemind you..I felt a bit guilty laughing at the fat black woman....is she dead?
Forget the dog. I need to find myself a fat woman to sit on like a blubbery sofa.
ReplyDeleteEvery time I see dogs introducing themselves to one another, I am once again pleased that I was not born a dog.
ReplyDeleteIf you're REALLY considering living the life of dog, we got our girl Maggie at the Multnomah County animal shelter out here in Troutdale.
We had her 15 years and had to have her put down in October. And it hurt so much and still does... so there's that to think about, too.
Would I do it all over again?
Immediately.
I know a dog. You can have her if you want.
ReplyDeleteWait, I forgot that you were actually talking about an actual dog. I thought it was a description or someth-
Forget it.
Good luck finding the perfect dog, Steve! - Just make sure you buy that dog for if you let a woman write a wish list of boxes your her dog should tick, you'll never be able to find it. Wait! That's a good thing, isn't it?
ReplyDelete