The Bin Laden post

Well Bin Laden is now dead......... apparently he was hiding out in Pakistan these past 10 years. Huh..... Now that just makes sense. Pakistan isn't even on the Risk board...... 
that's genius! It's amazing we ever caught him.....
But I (as well as the ever increasing strength of Google Maps) had faith it would happen someday. Basically it's like Hollywood & network TV teach us all.... we always get our bad guy with the possible exception of Verbal Kint and maybe the gopher from Caddyshack.

 ...Anyways I'm sure by now he's unresting in a place hotter and more misserable than most of the middle east. Even better, now that his "reign of asshole" is over he wont get to do any of those things he loved to do ...... again. And that makes me happy.

No more camel races. 

No more tagging himself in facebook photos next to fake WMD's..... Man that used to drive George W crazy!! 

No more Friday Night Car Revs... its basically where he and his buddies would needlessly rev their car engines just to waste gas, all the while wearing their "Suck it Western Civilization" T-shirts

No more sand castles.... he was quite talented though!

No more danger Jenga. You know a whole Jenga tower built outta peoples chopped off fingers. Just a hint... the thumbs are the hardest to get out.




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and No more patchwork quilting... I know I thought it was weird too....








Its over. We got him....  .... Hmm.... Well what now? Who becomes Americas public enemy number one now?

 Kim Jong Il  maybe  

or the Somali pirates...... that makes sense. But they kinda suck and don't even make people walk planks or wear any eye patches. Imposters!!   Plus its not even close to a fair fight...

or maybe the NFL owners..... I mean if their isn't any season this year they will definitely become my public enemy number one...

You know maybe we should just get back to better handling our own issues. I don't know? Maybe we could start checking for our 2012 Presidential candidates birth certificates now. Apparently they take a really long time to locate. Who knew?

But in all honesty........ I'm so happy Bin Laden finally got what he had coming to him..... did I crave his blood? No. I'm more of an eye for an eye kinda guy. Killing him seemed a bit too easy. I wanted him to suffer ...  I would have been just as happy had we captured him and forced him to live with the Kardashians or something. 


Maybe put him on the Amazing Race with Gary Bucey ..... or I know!!.... have him spend one season on Americas Next Top Model... man would he have hated every second of that! And then.... I guess we coulda offed him...

Regardless it was a good day for world safety and a good day for our President.... who I thought gave a great speech....no joke .... and maybe just maybe moving on..... we can all look forward to our TSA airport pat downs being just be a bit more relaxed.


Blog ya'll later.

The Portland in the...... sun post

So just a quick hitter today...... Its happened.... the sun has returned. Ah...... Bought time. For those of you unfamiliar with the northwest and Portland in particular. Every year we endure rain. Lots of it. 

In fact this year we even had a stretch of 28 straight days of rain. Is this hard to handle you ask? Well..... everybody handles it differently I guess. Most single people find some new love to cuddle up with through the winter. A kind of fornication hibernation I guess.

 Other people break out the eyeliner, turn off the lights in their apartment, and listen to bands like The Cure for long stretches while crying sensitive. Really any sad music will do..... One note if you choose this route next winter make sure you tell everyone what an under appreciated and tortured Portland artist you are. Everybody will totally understand. 

What else do people do? I guess some people start an embarrassing blog? Not recommended though....  just sayin ..... Regardless once the skies clear up, and for about 5 to 6 months out of the year, I wipe away my eyeliner, break up with my winter sweetie and step outside. And you know what.....  I fall right back in love with this town all over again.

 Really I wouldn't live anywhere else. This city comes alive. Every bar suddenly has a patio, the ladies start showing off their hard earned non-tans with skimpy outfits, people hit the parks and the outdoor hippyfests... er.... markets, struggling bands start playing music on every corner the cops aren't on. 




even the food carts start mutiplying.... 

Its magic..... and its home.....  so let me leave you all with a photo or two of a sunny Portland and if you are in town right now..... those pale legs are looking really hot and milky white ladies....... 

Floating the river. It doesn't get any better.

Flicks on the bricks in the square....

Portland fireworks

Um? Disregard... 

Oregon Country Fair.... one of many hippie gatherings... I mean Oregon cultural fairs.

Redbull Flutog is awesome...

This is real. Ive seen it.....  in SE Portland......  Classic Portland.

Anyways I could do photos of this town forever but I need to get outside. Blog ya'll later. Oh ya one more thing for those of you unfamiliar with our town..... We have a motto.... and there's a reason for it. Just sayin.....