Our Date.... Best Date Ever Post

For todays post.... lets all slip into something a little more comfortable...shall we? Lets dim the lights and put on some mood music.... That's right its about to get all romantical up in here. You see I more than just appreciate you.... my readers. I feel a much deeper (and more physical) connection to you all. 


And since its impossible to be right there with all of you, I thought we could date each other..... right here..... right now! Ready? Let me splash on some of my Khloe and Lamar unisex perfume. Ya that horrible idea actually exists! But whatever. Back to our date. Here we go....






Hey reader.... You look nice. Can I get ya something to drink?

Delicious huh! Ya most people would never think of mixing them together. Oh I almost forgot I saw something that totally made me think of you..... so I picked it up for you.

I hope you like it. I had a feeling you would.. I am, by the way, in no way implying anything.... about what I expect out of tonight..... of course. I am a total gentleman....... Maybe we should move to the couch.

Comfortable? You seem like you are getting a little nervous....  There's nothing to feel nervous about.. Listen....I think we are really connecting.... And with you looking all stupid pretty. I just wanna.....Come over here... you!

Oh ya!!!!  You like?  I told you I'm like the best dater ever! Bring those toes over here....

Ya..... you like that don't you?? Oh.... sorry about eating all that garlic and old cheese earlier. You might just wanna wash your feet after.... But I'm sure it was way worth it..  Hey has anyone told you... you have really sexy feet?

All of my readers feet

Well you do! Now..... Would you mind licking something for me? It may sound a little weird.... but I find it so exciting!

Wow I am feeling sparks between us! Let me slip out of these clothes...

Get over here! Wait wait!!!! Dont run!! 


Oh.... you got an emergency call? Funny I didn't even hear the phone ring..... Well we can just pick this up where we left off next time...... my future lovers!.


Alright good date everybody....  did you all have a good time?

"I just threw up in my mouth."

"I hate your... everything.... and want to punch your stupid fat face"

"Never ever never! Not gonna happen..... assclown. "

 "I cant wait for next time!" and
"Your remote tasted good... like  pizza!"

"Ya baby! Count me in"

"Us too..."

Uh........ Well I guess our date had mixed reviews? A success with some..... and not so much with others. Well..... until next time...... date ya... er... blog ya later everyone!