Tuesday, June 12, 2012

#3 of 14 A letter to a "Younger Me"??

Here's my 3rd favorite...
A post my therapist calls "extremely telling"??


Anyways here it is....
The "letter to a younger me" post..


Alright.....
So I noticed on another blog recently...
... that occasionally some bloggers write letters...
... to their younger selves??


Really?


Well apparently its a therapeutic way to deal with the past?


Huh?


Well I'll be damned......
 If everyone else is doing it.... 
I better do the same as well....
So here we go....




Dear young Steve,


Hey you little ass!


Its me!


Future you!


Shut up and listen!


I have a few things you need to hear...


And if you listen up..... 
I might just save you some serious grief and extreme humiliation.....


First off..... I understand growing up is gonna be hard for you....


You're gonna be confused about oh so many things?


And theirs gonna come a time when you decide making people laugh is something you think you are good at..... 


And then one day you are gonna think it would be funny to take some "creative"  funny photos of you and dads car? 


Listen up....
Please please......


Dont!!!


You are gonna regret it!!!! Trust me!!




Oh ya!
And then there's gonna come one summer...
When your parents will want to send you to summer camp...
Dont Go!!
Its a.....




Fat Camp stupid!!!
There gonna just starve you for three months!!

Its a nightmare!!

What else...
Oh... there's gonna come a year when you decide...
 You want to become friends with "the jocks" at school.....
... so you try to impress them...
 ...but by trying out for a sports team.....


Can you maybe rethink dance team?



Cause they wont be impressed!!!


And those jocks do mean things to the boys in dance team!



Oh and speaking of sports...


.... forget volleyball also!!
You're just gonna break your nose.... repeatedly!!


Are you paying attention?


Well I have some helpful suggestions too... if you listen!!


Like remember how you struggled getting good grades in science class.......


And how you decided to cheat!


Well Im fine with the cheating... of course?


But knowing what I know now..... 
Cheat off the girl in the pink skirt!!!


Cause she had ALL the answers!!


Oh and here's a good one! There will be a weekend in high school when you get asked to join the debate team on an overnight trip....


 GO ON THAT FREEKIN TRIP!!!! 


Why? 


Cause debate girls are easy!! 
I know.... who knew? 
I thought they just argued?




Oh and speaking of highschool..... when you are a freshman.... and the seniors ask you to join them for "a cool kids meeting" in the boys locker rooms!!!


Dont go!! They dont think your cool!!




What else?


Oh ya.... how could I forget!


Listen carefully dummy.... when it comes time for your senior photos....


Please rethink that stupid shirtless idea!!!




Anyways...... finally will come prom night. 
A night that could be magical...... but listen close!!!!


Bobby "Opportunist" Smith is gonna ask DeDee "Boobs" McGee to the prom on March 4th....
So ask her before he does... idiot!!!


or else you will end up going with....




.....Jenny "Dyebrows" Mulcher... 
and it will suck!!!


But whatever....... eventually your gonna graduate.


I know Im as shocked as you are reading this.....


First off ....


Spell it right!!!!


And then get ready for college......


But...... maybe I we'll save that letter for another day....


Cause I have a lot to share with you about that!!




Sincerely,
Future You


and blog ya'll later

15 comments:

  1. they do make me smile after a long day at work!

    ReplyDelete
  2. You actually had quite a lot of advice there for your past self. I feel sorry for whoever was with that car.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Too bad you don't have a delorean..haha

    ReplyDelete
  4. You handled this concept very well and with the hIgh humor that is your hallmark. Maybe I'll try doing this sometime, even though you've set the bar extremely high.

    ReplyDelete
  5. What's wrong with going out with Dyebrows... I mean, Jenny? Haha!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I thought all of them were supposed to be deep. This is damn funny!
    But aren't you trying to change the past that way, and just make a paradox?

    ReplyDelete
  7. I was a former jock (until I discovered the power of weed)and I can honestly say that I wouldn't do such cruel things. Nope. I would just trip you in the hall, nothing more.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I was a debate girl. I'm still easy.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete
  9. Do you really think that older you can recover from what younger you did? ;-) The car/heels photo is awesome!

    ReplyDelete
  10. What a great letter. I need something like that for younger me, who was naive and thought I'd be so much more than I am right now. What a chump.

    ReplyDelete