Wednesday, May 30, 2012

#10 The Kim Jong Il Roast

We arrive at #10 of my personal favorite posts. 
And this one.... well... this was a kind of obituary/roast really. 


Its the way he would have wanted it.... I like to think.
 "A fitting tribute to a powerful ass... er.. man." I like to call it.
Anyways here ya go....


We break from the planned Christmas post today for BREAKING NEWS. 


North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il has passed away at the age of  "Stupid Old". 
Which only continues the bad couple of years for world dictators everywhere. 




 "It is quite a blow to our upcoming World Dictator Summit" the increasingly nervous Iranian dictator and Terrorism 3D  aficionado Mamhoud Ahmadinejad said.




 "Im not sure we will be able to field a full camel polo match this year." he went on to say...




Now you see Kim Jong's death comes at a time when he was making huge strides to modernize North Korea sources tell the blog. 


And really put North Korea in the forefront of modern technology...


 And according to recent satellite imagery....


They could seriously use it!!!!


This also comes at a time when he finally had perfected his army...


Of girly high kickers?


Whatever... 
You see in all seriousness....
 He died of a massive heart attack on a train! 
Which if you have ever seen any of the trains in that region of the world...


It just kinda makes sense!


Anyways..... 
He will be remembered as a....
"Dictator who always loved a good train ride"
Why?


Cause he had so much fun with trains. 
"They could make him just light up"....
.... One of his "paid friends" would often say.


Like this sign he put up at a nearby train station..... 
....for his more American tourists!!


What a joker!!!


But let me leave you all with this today.


After much research we have uncovered a photo of the ACTUAL TRAIN that caused his heart to BURST through his chest.... 


And after "exhaustive" review of it we here at this blog... 
We totally understand why. 
Which one was it?




This one!
Man he never stood a chance!


Rest in Hell Kim Jong Il
and blog ya'll later



8 comments:

  1. haha yeah this one was great, deserved every little bit too.

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  2. I still miss ol Kim Jong, I loved that little guy. Goodnight, sweet prince.

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  3. I remember this post! I remember my great sadness at him passing before we had the chance to meet and I'd planned to have him butter my muffin at least once...

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  4. The good news is that his son has now taken over and he'll provide us with decades and decades worth of good times. I'm not sure if he appreciates running a train, um, train rides, as much as his father did, but I'm sure before long we'll find out.

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  5. R.I.P. buddy. Team America won't be the same without ya =/

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  6. I'm afraid I'm approaching "stupid old." Good thing I'm not a dictator.

    Love,
    Lola

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  7. Once again, I find your sense of humor to be delightfully "dark"

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  8. Can we arrange another such delicate surprise for his military commanders who are now ruling the next? ;-p

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